Hoping to be human someday!

Apology

Monday, December 29th, 2008

The following few posts on this blog will be on the controversial statements by Mr. Zakir Naik regarding the event of Karbala in 61 AH. I understand that these posts may hurt the feelings of his fans and others also may not like them. Some of you might be angry and hate me forever but my only motive through these posts is to spread truth and defeat falsehood.

You have all been awesome people and I don’t want to make you feel bad. If I hurt you, I’m sorry. That is seriously not my intention. But I have to face the Prophet (S.A.W.W.) someday. Could be anytime so I don’t want to say that I didn’t try or didn’t mean to.

Just don’t believe without proof.

The Origin of SAWJ

Saturday, December 27th, 2008

This may be the last of cheerful posts for a while as hopefully Muharram starts on Monday and then I’ll be running Zakir Naik’s ass all over the place, as promised to someone. :)

And I’ve quit smoking so be happy guys! :P

And be happy too that the Los Angeles Lakers brought the 19-game winning streak of the Boston Celtics to a halt on Christmas. Yippee-kaiyeay (find rest of the sentence at the end of any Die-Hard movie)! ;)

*****

I’ve always been one of those guys who wanted to be cool. At times, I would try and make cool things out of my name. One of them was summing up my initials to see what they formed, i.e., SAWJ.

But I wasn’t happy with it then. I mean, it does sound cheesy. :D

Khair, I was on a similar mission during my Intermediate years, trying to make something cool out of it. And then I discovered that SAWJ could be distorted to sound “savage”. ;)

So I made an email address as lethallysawj@hotmail.com and asked all my friends to pronounce it lethallysavage@hotmail.com. But friends can be real assholes and they did the exact opposite. They started teasing me by the name SAWJ.

As time passed, I actually started to like it. It was unique and it did give me a sense of closeness to my friends. And now I’ve become used to it. Almost all the dudes call me that now.

Now, I am…SAWJ!

But that don’t mean I don’t like my real and full names. Because they are my identity. My pride. Hell, if I tell you guys the real meaning of my first name, you will all call me a heretic and send a suicide bomber over. :P

SAWJ also acts as a cover for my real name, a box which protects the valuables.

*****

Cheesy post? Sorry! :)

*****

UPDATE: I forgot to write this. :D

My new jacket has been acting as my second skin these days. I wear it all the time, everyone’s praised it and it’s very cool! Cost me 3000 ruppees and my father was well-beyond angry. I saw a leather jacket at the shop too, made of sheep-skin and still smelling of sheep. It was 6000 ruppees! Had I bought that, my father would’ve made a jacket out of SAWJ-skin!

Ammi Aur Geo

Sunday, December 21st, 2008

I was pondering over my choice of topics to write:

  • The History of “SAWJ”
  • My Mom’s Wish To Become A Geo Anchor

I’ve decided to go along with the latter. This week is the last of my funny posts as next week, Muharram begins.

So it all started when my Mom came to me and asked me to get Geo’s number. Naturally, I asked why.

“I want to become an anchor on Geo.”

“Why?”

“I’ll earn money. I can be an anchor. Your father has given the go-ahead. Get me the number.”

“No way! You’re not going on Geo TV. I’m not going to let my dignity and honor be trampled this way.”

*****

Later, we were sitting with my father at the dining table.

امّی: اس سے کہیں، یہ مجھے جیو کا نمبر نہیں دے رہا۔

میں: جیو جا کے کرنا کیا ہے؟

امّی: بھئی پیسے ملیں گے، لوگوں کی نظروں میں آجائوں گی، مشھور ہو جائوں گی، سیاست میں آجائوں گی اور پھر وزیرِ اعظم بن جائوں گی۔

!بابا: اور پھر خودکش حملہ ہو جائے گا

My father has a killer sense of humor. He rarely jokes but they always hit bulls-eye!


Rand()

Thursday, December 18th, 2008

I intended to go jogging this morning so I went to bed early last night, around 1 a.m. I knew I won’t wake up in the morning at six. But when KESC decides to shower it’s blessings on you, you can’t help it.

I turned off my alarm at 6 a.m. and went back to sleep. Some time later, my grandfather woke me up to tell me that the electricity had “gone back home” and asked me to start the generator. It was six-twenty. After doing so, I thought what the heck, let’s go jogging! So I spent half an hour in the bathroom in a vain attempt to empty myself. Then I left the house at seven-twenty.

The park I went to is located near Imam Bargah-e-Bab-ul-Ilm, Five Star Chowrangi, North Nazimabad and it’s too big for my jogging taste (four Nando’s Chowrangis to be exact, and count the outer circumference). Khair, I made a walking round first. Then I started to jog. Completed the first round and then I realized what a shitty habit smoking is. It kills your lungs. And your lungs kill you. When you jog.

After that it was walk, jog, walk, jog, walk, jog. Four rounds and that was too much for me. My throat was completely dry and it felt like the veins in my nose were about to burst. So I returned.

Later, all the muscles in my legs were taught and aching.

Got my bicycle repaired today too. Replaced the tires, tubes and painted the rims, handle and mudguards. Looks okay now, I think.

The picture of SAWJ's Bicycle.

I spray-painted it along with another guy and my hands were silver and black when we finished. I swallowed some too, I think that’s why I’m coughing right now. Then I went for a ride…

One friggin small round, that’s it, one friggin small round and my legs were hurting again. I used to cycle at top-gear full speed, and today even one round at normal-gear fast speed was too much. Well I did manage and I went for more rounds later but the first one almost killed me.

Okay I like to exaggerate a little but my legs ARE going to kill me tomorrow. It’ll get back to normal soon. Hope someone wakes me up tomorrow morning too.

*****

And I’ve been listening to Metallica’s Suicide And Redemption from Death Magnetic for the past few days. It’s a killer!

Awesome, just bloody awesome! Get’s depressing in the middle (that’s what I’ve been feeling for the last few days). Then it picks up and Hammet just kills with the guitar. :D

*****

On another note, I really enjoyed posting the answer to the SAWJ quiz. Some people are out to kill me now! :P

Allah And The Intricacies Of Space-Time

Sunday, December 14th, 2008

I asked a question “The Universe is billions of years old. How old then, is Allah?”

Well, here’s the answer after a long wait.

Asking “How old?” implies a measurement of time. Now we all know that time started when the Universe was created. And so did space. But this reduces our frame of thought. There could be any number of things that might have been created before our Universe. There may be parallel universes running alongside ours for all we know.

You can skip this blockquote if you want.

There are many theories about the birth of the Universe. One of them is of Quantum Fluctuation.

Planck Time is the earliest moment in history where our physics still works. It is the shortest amount of time we can probe in the laboratory with our current knowledge of physics. It’s value is 10-43 sec.

This particular theory states that Universe was born from a quantum vacuum. A quantum vacuum is a state of a quantum field in which no quanta are excited, i.e. no particles are present. It is a state of minimum energy and has potentiality (read Potential Energy). Laws of classical physics do not apply here, only quantum mechanics. Our Universe originated from a quantum vacuum. Before Planck time (10-43 seconds of the Universe), classical physics is not applicable to the Universe, i.e. space-time did not exist.

Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle states that for a pair of conjugate variables for a particle, such as position/momentum and energy/time, it is impossible to have a precisely determined value of each member of the pair at the same time. For example, a particle pair can pop out of the vacuum during a very short time interval.

So what the theory states is that according to Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle, there were fluctuations in the vacuum and particles pairs appeared and disappeared quickly, from nothingness. This is not ordinary nothingness, it has potentiality. Slowly, this gave birth to the Universe which was a compact particle in the beginning with extremely high density, and expanded into “black holes forming and disappearing”. Expansion continued, space-time formed after Planck Time and slowly the Universe was created as we see it today.

I’m sorry, that was the most I could understand of this crappy concept. But it accepts the fact that energy (potentiality) was present at the beginning in the quantum vacuum. It’s origin, anyone?

If we take the first creation of Allah, i.e. the Holy Prophet Muhammad (S.A.W.W.) and mark it as the beginning of celestial time, much before the birth of the Universe, or as the beginning of “all” time, what before it?

Allah is the creator of all, He created Space-Time so He cannot be subject to it. But the question above provides one problem in this theory. What was Allah doing before the origin of celestial time? The word “origin” indicates a beginning. If Allah is devoid of space-time, He has neither a future, nor a past. Only the present. If so, how do we explain our “past, present and future” in terms of His “present”?

Simple!

Let’s take the example of a ray of light. It travels from the Sun to our Earth. Let the Sun and Earth be two points A and B, respectively. At all given moments of our time, Allah is watching both points. He is aware of all that will happen when the ray originates from A, to the moment it culminates at B, i.e. He can see the past, present and future of that ray of light, at the same time!

Still confused? Let me simplify it more.

Picture a film editor with a reel of film spread out before him. The film is divided into different frames, each of which has a different moment of time imprinted on it. When we watch the film on a screen, each frame appears one by one, creating a “motion” effect. But the editor is looking at all frames at the same time.

Here, each frame on the film is analogous to each moment of time. We experience motion but Allah is looking at all moments simultaneously!

For Him, Prophet Adam (A.S.) is being created, the storm of Nooh (A.S.) is in full swing, Musa (A.S.) is splitting the Nile with his Asa (walking stick), Eesa (A.S.) is being crucified, Muhammad (S.A.W.W.) is declaring Prophethood, Ali (A.S.) is being born in the Ka’bah and martyred in the mosque of Kufah, Husain (A.S.) being slain in Karbala with his family and friends, Pakistan gaining independence, me typing this post, Zakir Naik and [Dr. ?] Israr Ahmed going bonkers and upholding the tyrannical Bani Umayyads (L.A.), all at the same moment!

Savvy? :lol:

I’m feeling sleepy…