Hoping to be human someday!

I Wanna Kick MSN Astrology’s Ass!

Tuesday, December 23rd, 2008

Your horoscope for December 23, 2008

You could feel things take off in your romantic life today, Ali. If you have been single for a while, you might find yourself engaged in a charming flirtation now. You could meet someone whose sense of humor is a match for your own! You’ll have fun bantering back and forth, sharing your clever thoughts about life. A nice spark of chemistry should be there, too, and affections could be flamed.

WTF?!

I’m trying to get over it here and…

Talk about the right horoscope at the wrong time!

*****

UPDATE: I just received this email from Astrocenter Special:

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Finally when my mood was getting better, these assholes…

Ammi Aur Geo

Sunday, December 21st, 2008

I was pondering over my choice of topics to write:

  • The History of “SAWJ”
  • My Mom’s Wish To Become A Geo Anchor

I’ve decided to go along with the latter. This week is the last of my funny posts as next week, Muharram begins.

So it all started when my Mom came to me and asked me to get Geo’s number. Naturally, I asked why.

“I want to become an anchor on Geo.”

“Why?”

“I’ll earn money. I can be an anchor. Your father has given the go-ahead. Get me the number.”

“No way! You’re not going on Geo TV. I’m not going to let my dignity and honor be trampled this way.”

*****

Later, we were sitting with my father at the dining table.

امّی: اس سے کہیں، یہ مجھے جیو کا نمبر نہیں دے رہا۔

میں: جیو جا کے کرنا کیا ہے؟

امّی: بھئی پیسے ملیں گے، لوگوں کی نظروں میں آجائوں گی، مشھور ہو جائوں گی، سیاست میں آجائوں گی اور پھر وزیرِ اعظم بن جائوں گی۔

!بابا: اور پھر خودکش حملہ ہو جائے گا

My father has a killer sense of humor. He rarely jokes but they always hit bulls-eye!


A Woman took her Son to a Doctor…

Thursday, August 7th, 2008

A woman took her son to a doctor and said:

-ڈاکٹر صاحب، میرا بیٹا موٹرسائیکل سے گر گیا ہے

Doctor: “Please speak in English. I don’t know Urdu.”

Woman: “My Londa gironda from Hero Honda!